RETIREMENT WISHES
[insert number of years]
or so have flown by and this will be the last time that I will formally present
a speech to all of you at [insert name of company]. It has been a happy
time - a time where I gave of my expertise, a time where I imparted skills and
some life lessons and aptly also a time where I learned a great deal.
I have learned that [insert name
of company] is underpinned by a Board of Governors [adapt to suit the
managerial structure of the company] that gives selflessly of their time
and expertise. I have been involved in meetings and I value the opportunities
that I have been exposed to. I have more empathy for what it takes to to run a
company such as [insert name of company] - the strategic and
financial planning that is required - while at the same time keeping all
the stakeholders happy, maintaining the honor and integrity of our
company's vision, while still being open to innovative change. It has been a
significant learning curve for me and one which I undoubtedly learned a great
deal from.
The past few years have also taught
me the value of having a positive and enthusiastic group of co-workers. I have
witnessed colleagues giving tirelessly of their time to enhance the image and
productivity of [insert name of company]. In my retirement speeches,
I want to acknowledge that you have all played your part in making [insert
name of company] a happier and more productive place. I have also learned
that this is the role that I will strive to emulate in my future.
I also need to acknowledge just how
much I have been shaped by my colleagues and friends at [insert name of
company]. I have a myriad of experiences, too many to mention, that have
impacted on my life in a memorable and meaningful way. What follows barely
scratches on on the surface of all that I have learned over the years, but bare
with me as I make mention of some of these memories.
I have learned Ladies and Gentlemen,
-that it takes a group of very
special people to commit to their jobs on a daily basis - even when the going
gets tough - and believe me...we've all experienced that over the years.
-that our buildings and grounds are
maintained on a daily basis by a group of smiling and cheerful individuals who
choose to be happy.
I have learned,
-that if your computer is broken and
you approach it mumbling under your breath with the odd uncensored word and a
wet wipe, followed by a sharp kick to the hard drive, it will quite
miraculously resume working.
-that the peals of laughter I hear
resounding from the staff room reflect the vibrant and happy staff that we are
fortunate to have.
-that a cup of coffee before the day
starts with friends can make a difference - can give you that much needed
perspective.
In retirement speeches,
Ladies and Gentlemen, I need to add,
-that I would have been absolutely
useless at unraveling the mysteries of [ insert an activity that you find
difficult] yet somehow it all becomes clear when [finish off with the
activity that someone does easily].
-that it is impossible to keep the
copier free of paper jams. Oh, incidentally, the computer-hard-drive-kick
approach also works well here!
-and that I really do appreciate the
respect that I was always treated with.
Very importantly, I have learned,
-that we are exposed to phenomenal
opportunities for growth at [insert name of company] - of that I have no
doubt - and I have equally learned that we may only fully appreciate them as we
move on as [insert name of company]'s ambassadors in the world.
And then you'll be glad to hear, I
have learned,
-that the only thing you should ever
lie awake at night worrying about, is not retirement speeches or [insert
name of company] - sorry boss- but whether or not [insert name of favorite
sports team ] is lying top of the league!
And finally, personally, I have
learned that "Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight
for it, strive for it and insist upon it - always!".
I am extremely grateful for the role
that everyone has played throughout the years - they have been happy years and
years that I will always remember fondly.
FREE RETIREMENT PARTY SPEECH
Good evening Ladies, Gentlemen,
Friends and Special Guests,
Retirement dinner speeches
... wow ... what an audience!
Someone once said that the best
audience is one that is intelligent,well-educated and ... a little
drunk! If that is the case - then I have definitely got an amazing audience
here tonight.
Lord Reading offered the following
advice on presenting a speech: "Always be shorter than anyone dared to
hope!" and tonight Ladies and Gentlemen, you may be very hopeful.
Some people come into your life
briefly and fleetingly and then they move on just as quickly.
But then there others, others like
all my friends and colleagues at [insert name of company].
Not only have you come into my life,
but you have stayed a while! Your professional expertise, your friendship,
your mentorship and your advice and guidance have left indelible footprints in
my life, my memories and my heart.
I suppose that for me, a lot of
things will never be the same. The story of my life may not always have had a
clear beginning, a definitive middle or even a perfect ending. I don't know all
the answers, yet I know that change is inevitable.
I am looking forward to my
retirement and the opportunities that are sure to follow, but at the same time,
I will always reflect happily on the time I spent at [insert name of company]
and the knowledge I gained and the friendships that were forged.
I hope that we will meet again, when
we least expect it. May the good wishes so beautifully expressed in the Irish
Blessing be ever present in your lives!
May you always have work for your
hands to do.
May your pockets always hold a coin
or two. May the sun shine bright upon your window pane.
May a rainbow follow each rain. And
may the hand of a friend always be near you.
That's it everyone. I hope that I was shorter than you all dared
hope for? Franklin D. Roosevelt said: "Be sincere; be brief; be
seated".
Thank you and enjoy the rest of
evening.
RETIREMENT WISHES
Retirement! I can't quite believe
that it is happening to me.
You always seem to think of
retirement as something way ahead of you; something that is still a long way
off. Well, it has a way of sneaking up on you. And here I am ... poised on the
brink of my own retirement.
Retirement is an amazing opportunity
and I have always been excited by the notion of new beginnings. It brings with
it the prospect of a fresh start and perhaps a hint of magical anticipation
that is hard to ignore and even harder not to be enthusiastic about.
But just as much as my retirement
brings with it anticipation for the future; it is also a time to reflect on the
past and perhaps a moment that brings with it echoes from the past and our
years together.
So many of my memories at [insert
name of company] are underpinned by that which may seem invisible and
intangible.
I am, and will always be grateful
for the invisible, yet ever present support and friendship that I have been
fortunate to share with so many colleagues.
Seemingly insignificant moments
throughout the years ... coffee break chats; working together to meet an
important deadline; implementing a new vision; sharing a birthday cake or
celebrating in the news of a christening, a birthday or a wedding - these are
the moments that I will miss the most - these are the intangible everyday
magical moments that define the special people who make [insert name of
company].
May the years ahead be happy ones-
May the company and all of you go
from strength to strength-
And may you always continue to
listen to your heart - because in the end - some of the most beautiful things
that you'll ever experience will be seen and heard through your heart.
Thank you one and all.
WORDS FOR RETIREMENT / Humorous
Quotes
Go well...As you move into a future
bright with possibility...
A future of challenges to conquer
and of dreams to aspire to - our best wishes travel with you!
Our best wishes go with you…May you have days
full of laughter and happiness…
And may you have a lifetime full of
love and dreams achieved – we will remember you.
You have left your indelible mark, We
will miss your professional expertise and your friendship
And wish you only success and
happiness in your future endeavors - may they be all that you hoped for!
A friend is someone who knows the
song in your heart, and can sing it back, when you have forgotten the words... We will miss your friendship and positive
disposition - we'll keep your song in our hearts!
Trust what you know, Have faith
where you go; If there's no wind - row.. or go with the flow.
(Ed Parrish 111)
As you move on into the next amazing
chapter of your life, Know that you will be missed,
Know that our very best wishes
and thoughts go with you, Come and visit us often -
For this is farewell and not
goodbye. Today, we take the opportunity to say
We will miss you as you go on your
way, So goodbye to our dear colleague, friend and mentor,
Your future awaits - with you - its
inventor. Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous
When I was sixty-five - I still had
pimples. George Burns
Retirement life: seen it all, done
it all - Can't remember most of it! Unknown
A retired husband is often a wife's
full time job. Ella Harris
Before deciding to retire
early...Stay home a week and practice watching daytime television.
Unknown
Retirement means no pressure, no
stress, no heartache... Unless you play golf!
Gene Perret
I enjoy waking up and not having to
go to work - So I do it three or four
times a day!
Gene Perret
The best time to start thinking
about your retirement - Is before your boss does!
Unknown
The money is no better in
retirement...
But the hours are!
Unknown
Heaven - that's my retirement plan!
Unknown
I always arrive late at the
office...But I make up for it by leaving early.
Charles Lamb
When you stop lying about your age
and start lying around the house...
You know you're retired!
Unknown
People ask me what I'd most
appreciate getting for my eighty seventh birthday?
I tell them...a paternity suit!
George Burns
The
down side of retirement... Is having to drink coffee on your own
time.
Unknown
You know you're getting old when you
stoop to tie your shoelaces...
And wonder what else you could do
while you're down there!
George Burns
Retirement must be wonderful.
I mean, you can suck in your stomach
for only so long.
Burt Reynolds
In retirement only money and symptoms
are consequential.
Mason Cooley
Robert Half
The secret of longevity... Is to keep
breathing!
Sophie Tucker At my age flowers scare me!
George Burns
At my age...I'm very pleased to be
anywhere!
George Burns
FREE SAMPLE RETIREMENT SPEECH
Good Evening Colleagues and Friends,
"I'm very pleased to be here.
Let's face it - at my age...I'm very pleased to be anywhere!"
George Burns certainly has a way with words! But seriously Ladies and
Gentlemen, I am very pleased to be here tonight on the occasion of my
retirement dinner - despite my age.
As I stand here tonight, I look out
over all the faces of my colleagues and I consider how blessed I am to be able
count so many of you as friends. I have indeed been incredibly fortunate to
have been surrounded by so many friends, mentors, role models, respected
business people, leaders and pioneers - all of you special in your respective
and unique ways.
Someone once said, "You only
live once - but if you do it correctly - once is more than enough!
Wise words indeed and upon
reflection - very true. You do only live once and your career is no exception -
and if you do it correctly - one working life is more than enough. Here at [insert
name of company] we do it correctly!
I have been exposed to so many
opportunities for my vocational, as well as personal growth. Challenges were
set before me, but they were underpinned by the support of the group and their
belief that it could be done. Advice was freely given, a helping hand extended
and yes at times...constructive criticism and suggestions were offered.
May I extend my warmest thanks to
everyone for the positive role that you have played in my life and my time at [insert
name of company]. May I also extend a special word of thanks to following
people: [insert special names and aspects here].
Well, they say that the down side of
retirement is having to drink coffee on your own time. I am looking
forward to a little more of my own time, but I will surely miss you all during
my coffee breaks in the future.
Keep living this one life correctly,
stay well and keep smiling.
I will miss you.
FREE SAMPLE RETIREMENT SPEECH
Good evening Ladies, Gentlemen and
more importantly ... Friends,
Robert Half once quipped,
"There are some who start their retirement long before they stop
working." Well, every company is allowed to have one of
those guys ... and it was me! So, no respite for the rest you - you are all
going to have to work really hard until you retire!
On a more serious note though, I
can't believe that I am standing here this evening with my retirement just days
away. [Insert name of company] has played an integral role in my life
for [insert number of years]. It is a time and experience that I will
hold close to me in the future.
I consider it both a privilege and
an honor to have been involved with a company such as [insert name of
company]. Together, collectively, we have seen amazing things happen -
visions have been created, goals were structured and aspirations that started
out as ideals, more often than not, become tangible realities.
Our success is a testimony to each
and everyone here. We have worked together, argued together, shared our
problems and hopes together and established ourselves as a team - not always in
agreement, but always together.
Today, I would like to pay tribute
to your dedication, your commitment, your innovative approach and your professionalism.
I count myself most fortunate. I have come to see you all, not only as business
colleagues, but as friends too!
Thank you for the happy memories
that I will take with me, thank you for the opportunities that were offered to
me and thank you for the friendships forged over the years we spent together.
I am looking forward to the
opportunities and challenges that await me in my retirement - I hope that they
are many and varied and that they force me out of my comfort zone.
Yet at the same time, as I look back
on my time here at [insert name of company], I see a time well spent, a
time with few regrets ... a happy time!
Go well ... my thanks to you - one
and all.
RETIREMENT GREETINGS
On the day of your retirement we
need to affirm - just how much you will be missed;
just how much you have contributed
to our [insert name of company];
and just how much your presence and
input ... will continue to hold a special place in all of our hearts.
My retirement is an opportunity to
remember and reflect -
I will remember all the everyday
moments - somehow magical in their own right;
I will reflect upon the champagne
and caviar occasions - a celebration of our successful collaboration,
but most importantly in the years
that lie ahead ... I hope to reminisce fondly with friends I have made along
the way as I venture into a new chapter of my life! Goodbye and farewell
- words that are never easily spoken. And
today is no exception. As I stand here
today, ambivalence surrounds me -
Excitement and enthusiasm for the
new challenges that await; A certain
apprehension for time that needs to be filled in a new, constructive way; Nostalgia for happy memories shared;
Gratitude for a wealth of knowledge
gained; And the inevitable twinge of sadness that marks the day of my
retirement. I will miss you all!
Retirement wishes are full of conflicting emotions. We
express our regret for no more will we call you ...
our amazing colleague! Instead
however, and even more importantly,
we will always call you friend, mentor
and role model to many.
May your retirement years be happy
and memorable;just like the legacy that you will leave behind.
Happy Retirement!
Retirement Speech: 18 Speech Topics
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of the biggest developments in the past years. This easy
technique works for both retirement speech outlines on this page. Well, now
lets start to collect retirement public speaking speech ideas.
Your Own Free Retirement Speech
Topics
Try to be light hearted, personal,
sincere and thankful. This speech outline might help you developing retirement
writing topics.
1. Immediately catch the attention
with a oneliner or joke about the organization or company your have worked for.
Say something like this: What will stand out as I look back at the past xx
years?
2. Reflect on what has been changed
since you start working. Mention your thoughts and ideas about routines, rites
and procedures then and now. Present these retirement speech topics with humor.
3. Mention some funny, amusing
incidents during your working life. Think about the habits in office, the
managers, the business, the world outside.
4. Remember milestones in the
history of the organization. Describe what happened. What you thought of it
then, and what do we think of it now.
5. Pay attention to the colleagues
in your public speaking speech. Tell what you liked about working with them.
The practical jokes, the daily things you always talked and laughed about. The
career promotion opportunities.
6. Tell what you are going to do
now. What are your plans for the future?
7. Tell - if appropriate - about the
support of your partner, children or other family members.
8. Thank for the gifts. Thank for
the best wishes.
9. Thank the people who organized
the party.
10. Promise not to forget them and
wish them all the best in return.
A Free Retirement Speech Outline If
Someone Else Is Retiring
Try to describe your best memories
for the person who is leaving. Use heart felt words.
1. Refer to her or his contributions
to the organization.
2. Relect on the working life, jobs
and tasks of the retiree.
3. Reflect on the skills,
specialties and other talents. This kind of ideas for a retirement speech
demands concrete examples.
4. Mention an amusing incident with
the retiree playing a principal part. Ask the direct colleagues for detailed
information.
5. Refer on the retiree's plans for
the future.
6. Don not forget to mention the
partner or other family members, like children. Especially if they are present
at the ceremony. Thank them for their support.
7. Close your retirement speech by
presenting a gift to the retiree. Expound why you have chosen this special
present. Link it to your previous writing topics.
8. A toast and best wishes to the
person who retires is a perfect end of a retirement speech.
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QUOTATIONS
Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetime, is certain for those who are friends. ~Richard Bach We only part to meet again. ~John Gay Man's feelings are always purest and most glowing in the hour of meeting and of farewell. ~Jean Paul Richter Parting is all we know of heaven and all we need to know of hell. ~Emily Dickinson, "Parting" Why does it take a minute to say hello and forever to say goodbye? ~Author Unknown Gone - flitted away, Taken the stars from the night and the sun From the day! Gone, and a cloud in my heart. ~Alfred Tennyson Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos. ~Charles M. Schulz Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes. ~Henry David Thoreau How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie Goodbyes are not forever. Goodbyes are not the end. They simply mean I'll miss you Until we meet again! ~Author Unknown The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be the beginning. ~Ivy Baker Priest Absence from whom we love is worse than death, and frustrates hope severer than despair. ~William Cowper Excuse me, then! you know my heart; But dearest friends, alas! must part. ~John Gay To die and part is a less evil; but to part and live, there, there is the torment. ~George Lansdowne May the road rise up to meet you, may the wind be ever at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face and the rain fall softly on your fields. And until we meet again, may God hold you in the hollow of his hand. ~Irish Blessing Happy trails to you, until we meet again. Some trails are happy ones, Others are blue. It's the way you ride the trail that counts, Here's a happy one for you. ~Dale Evans No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth. ~Robert Southey Can miles truly separate you from friends.... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? ~Richard Bach Be well, do good work, and keep in touch. ~Garrison Keillor What shall I do with all the days and hours That must be counted ere I see thy face? How shall I charm the interval that lowers Between this time and that sweet time of grace? ~Frances Anne Kemble Not to understand a treasure's worth till time has stole away the slighted good, is cause of half the poverty we feel, and makes the world the wilderness it is. ~William Cowper She went her unremembering way, She went and left in me The pang of all the partings gone, And partings yet to be. ~Francis Thompson Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart. ~Kay Knudsen The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. ~Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook You and I will meet again When we're least expecting it One day in some far off place I will recognize your face I won't say goodbye my friend For you and I will meet again ~Tom Petty Farewell! God knows when we shall meet again. ~William Shakespeare In the hope to meet Shortly again, and make our absence sweet. ~Ben Jonson Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same. ~Flavia Weedn, Forever, © Flavia.com So sweetly she bade me adieu, I thought that she bade me return. ~William Shenstone But fate ordains that dearest friends must part. ~Edward Young Love reckons hours for months, and days for years; and every little absence is an age. ~John Dryden Where is the good in goodbye? ~Meredith Willson, The Music Man (Thanks, Thomas) |
Distance of time and
place generally cure what they seem to aggravate; and taking leave of our
friends resembles taking leave of the world, of which it has been said, that it
is not death, but dying, which is terrible. ~Henry Fielding
As the presence of those we love is as a double life, so absence, in its anxious longing and sense of vacancy, is as a foretaste of death. ~Anna Brownell Jameson
Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave. ~A.A. Milne
As contraries are known by contraries, so is the delight of presence best known by the torments of absence. ~Alcibiades
May you always have work for your hands to do. May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane. May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you? And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
~Irish Blessing
Good-byes breed a sort of distaste for whomever you say good-bye to; this hurts, you feel, this must not happen again. ~Elizabeth Bowen
May the sun shine, all day long, everything go right, and nothing wrong. May those you love bring love back to you, and may all the wishes you wish come true!
~Irish Blessing
May you always have walls for the winds, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire,
laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all your heart might desire.
~Irish Blessing
Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire. ~Francois Duc de la Rochefoucauld, translated from French
Every parting is a form of death, as every reunion is a type of heaven. ~Tryon Edwards
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. ~Kahlil Gibran
Farewell, my sister, fare thee well. The elements be kind to thee, and make Thy spirits all of comfort: fare thee well.~William Shakespeare
A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it. ~Helen Rowland
The return makes one love the farewell. ~Alfred De Musset
You're searching... For things that don't exist; I mean beginnings.
Ends and beginnings - there are no such things.There are only middles.
~Robert Frost, Mountain Interval, "In the Home Stretch"
Fare thee well! and if for ever,
Still for ever, fare thee well. ~Lord Byron
May you have warm words on a cool evening, a full moon on a dark night, and a smooth road all the way to your door. ~Irish Toast
If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden. ~Attributed to Claudia Ghandi
Ye flowers that drop, forsaken by the spring, Ye birds that, left by summer, cease to sing,
Ye trees that fade, when Autumn heats remove, Say, is not absence death to those who love?
~Alexander Pope
The best things said come last. People will talk for hours saying nothing much and then linger at the door with words that come with a rush from the heart. ~Alan Alda
May flowers always line your path and sunshine light your day. May songbirds serenade you every step along the way. May a rainbow run beside you in a sky that's always blue.
And may happiness fill your heart each day your whole life through. ~Irish Blessing
That bitter word, which closed all earthly friendships and finished every feast of love farewell! ~Robert Pollok
One kind kiss before we part, Drop a tear, and bid adieu; Though we sever, my fond heart
Till we meet shall pant for you. ~Robert Dodsley
The joy of meeting pays the pangs of absence; else who could bear it? ~Nicholas Rowe
Adieu! I have too grieved a heart to take a tedious leave. ~William Shakespeare
A sunbeam to warm you, A moonbeam to charm you,A sheltering angel, so nothing can harm you.
~Irish Blessing
Where'er I roam, whatever realms to see, My heart untravelled, fondly turns to thee;
Still to my brother turns, with ceaseless pain, And drags at each remove a lengthening chain.
~Oliver Goldsmith, The Traveller
If I leave here tomorrow, will you still remember me? ~Allen Collins and Ronnie Van Zant, "Free Bird," One More From the Road, 1973, performed by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Great is the art of beginning, but greater is the art of ending. ~Lazurus Long
May brooks and trees and singing hills Join in the chorus too, And every gentle wind that blows
Send happiness to you.
~Irish Blessing
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. ~Gilda Radner
Sweet is the memory of distant friends! Like the mellow rays of the departing sun, it falls tenderly, yet sadly, on the heart. ~Washington Irving
Farewell! a word that must be, and hath been - A sound which makes us linger; - yet - farewell!
~Lord Byron
Goodbye, goodbye, I hate the word. Solitude has long since turned brown and withered, sitting bitter in my mouth and heavy in my veins. ~R.M. Grenon
Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will. ~Author Unknown
Farewell!
For in that word - that fatal word - howe'erWe promise - hope - believe - there breathes despair.
~Lord Byron
Let's not unman each other - part at once; All farewells should be sudden, when forever,
Else they make an eternity of moments,And clog the last sad sands of life with tears.
~Lord Byron
C~Author Unknown
A chord, stronger or weaker, is snapped asunder in every parting, and time's busy fingers are not practiced in re-splicing broken ties. Meet again you may; will it be in the same way? With the same sympathies? With the same sentiments? Will the souls, hurrying on in diverse paths, unite once more, as if the interval had been a dream? Rarely, rarely! ~Edward George Earle Bulwer-Lytton
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in this life. ~Jean Paul Richter
Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. ~Theodor Seuss Geisel, attributed
As the presence of those we love is as a double life, so absence, in its anxious longing and sense of vacancy, is as a foretaste of death. ~Anna Brownell Jameson
Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave. ~A.A. Milne
As contraries are known by contraries, so is the delight of presence best known by the torments of absence. ~Alcibiades
May you always have work for your hands to do. May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane. May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you? And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
~Irish Blessing
Good-byes breed a sort of distaste for whomever you say good-bye to; this hurts, you feel, this must not happen again. ~Elizabeth Bowen
May the sun shine, all day long, everything go right, and nothing wrong. May those you love bring love back to you, and may all the wishes you wish come true!
~Irish Blessing
May you always have walls for the winds, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire,
laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all your heart might desire.
~Irish Blessing
Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire. ~Francois Duc de la Rochefoucauld, translated from French
Every parting is a form of death, as every reunion is a type of heaven. ~Tryon Edwards
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. ~Kahlil Gibran
Farewell, my sister, fare thee well. The elements be kind to thee, and make Thy spirits all of comfort: fare thee well.~William Shakespeare
A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it. ~Helen Rowland
The return makes one love the farewell. ~Alfred De Musset
You're searching... For things that don't exist; I mean beginnings.
Ends and beginnings - there are no such things.There are only middles.
~Robert Frost, Mountain Interval, "In the Home Stretch"
Fare thee well! and if for ever,
Still for ever, fare thee well. ~Lord Byron
May you have warm words on a cool evening, a full moon on a dark night, and a smooth road all the way to your door. ~Irish Toast
If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden. ~Attributed to Claudia Ghandi
Ye flowers that drop, forsaken by the spring, Ye birds that, left by summer, cease to sing,
Ye trees that fade, when Autumn heats remove, Say, is not absence death to those who love?
~Alexander Pope
The best things said come last. People will talk for hours saying nothing much and then linger at the door with words that come with a rush from the heart. ~Alan Alda
May flowers always line your path and sunshine light your day. May songbirds serenade you every step along the way. May a rainbow run beside you in a sky that's always blue.
And may happiness fill your heart each day your whole life through. ~Irish Blessing
That bitter word, which closed all earthly friendships and finished every feast of love farewell! ~Robert Pollok
One kind kiss before we part, Drop a tear, and bid adieu; Though we sever, my fond heart
Till we meet shall pant for you. ~Robert Dodsley
The joy of meeting pays the pangs of absence; else who could bear it? ~Nicholas Rowe
Adieu! I have too grieved a heart to take a tedious leave. ~William Shakespeare
A sunbeam to warm you, A moonbeam to charm you,A sheltering angel, so nothing can harm you.
~Irish Blessing
Where'er I roam, whatever realms to see, My heart untravelled, fondly turns to thee;
Still to my brother turns, with ceaseless pain, And drags at each remove a lengthening chain.
~Oliver Goldsmith, The Traveller
If I leave here tomorrow, will you still remember me? ~Allen Collins and Ronnie Van Zant, "Free Bird," One More From the Road, 1973, performed by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Great is the art of beginning, but greater is the art of ending. ~Lazurus Long
May brooks and trees and singing hills Join in the chorus too, And every gentle wind that blows
Send happiness to you.
~Irish Blessing
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. ~Gilda Radner
Sweet is the memory of distant friends! Like the mellow rays of the departing sun, it falls tenderly, yet sadly, on the heart. ~Washington Irving
Farewell! a word that must be, and hath been - A sound which makes us linger; - yet - farewell!
~Lord Byron
Goodbye, goodbye, I hate the word. Solitude has long since turned brown and withered, sitting bitter in my mouth and heavy in my veins. ~R.M. Grenon
Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will. ~Author Unknown
Farewell!
For in that word - that fatal word - howe'erWe promise - hope - believe - there breathes despair.
~Lord Byron
Let's not unman each other - part at once; All farewells should be sudden, when forever,
Else they make an eternity of moments,And clog the last sad sands of life with tears.
~Lord Byron
C~Author Unknown
A chord, stronger or weaker, is snapped asunder in every parting, and time's busy fingers are not practiced in re-splicing broken ties. Meet again you may; will it be in the same way? With the same sympathies? With the same sentiments? Will the souls, hurrying on in diverse paths, unite once more, as if the interval had been a dream? Rarely, rarely! ~Edward George Earle Bulwer-Lytton
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in this life. ~Jean Paul Richter
Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. ~Theodor Seuss Geisel, attributed
|
The
trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. ~Abe Lemons
When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. ~R.C. Sherriff When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job. ~Ella Harris Retired is being twice tired, I've thought First tired of working, Then tired of not. ~Richard Armour I've been attending lots of seminars in my retirement. They're called naps. ~Merri Brownworth Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese. ~Gene Perret I'm retired - goodbye tension, hello pension! ~Author Unknown Retirement: World's longest coffee break. ~Author Unknown Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me. I never had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids, my wife, the tree outside my very own front door. And, the beauty of time itself. ~Hartman Jule O, blest retirement! friend to life's decline - How blest is he who crowns, in shades like these, A youth of labor with an age of ease! ~Oliver Goldsmith Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work. ~Author Unknown Life begins at retirement. ~Author Unknown The challenge of retirement is how to spend time without spending money. ~Author Unknown If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles. ~Doug Larson Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it. ~Gene Perret There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. ~Robert Half Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. ~J. Lubbock When you retire, think and act as if you were still working; when you're still working, think and act a bit as if you were already retired. ~Author Unknown The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income. ~George Foreman Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. ~Gene Perret I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. ~Hartman Jule Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~Jim Bishop Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. ~Author Unknown Don't simply retire from something; have something to retire to. ~Harry Emerson Fosdick I'm now as free as the breeze - with roughly the same income. ~Gene Perret |
Half our life is
spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life
trying to save. ~Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949
When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you. ~Gene Perret
When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. ~Gail Sheehy
There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial. ~Seneca
Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can't retire his experience. He must use it. ~Bernard Baruch
A gold watch is the most appropriate gift for retirement, as its recipients have given up so many of their golden hours in a lifetime of service. ~Harry Mahtar
Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering. ~Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A.A. Milne
Retirement is having nothing to do and someone always keeping you from it. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Retire from work, but not from life. ~M.K. Soni
Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow. ~Douglas Pagels, These Are the Gifts I'd Like to Give to You
There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day. ~Gene Perret
In retirement, every day is Boss Day and every day is Employee Appreciation Day. ~Terri Guillemets
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. ~Jonathan Clements
I try to treat each evening and weekend as little slices of retirement because no one is guaranteed a lengthy one at the end of their career. ~Mike Hammar
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples. ~George Burns
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Retirement is the ugliest word in the language. ~Ernest Hemingway
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
In my retirement I go for a short swim at least once or twice every day. It's either that or buy a new golf ball. ~Gene Perret
Sometimes it's hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. ~Terri Guillemets
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did. ~Malcolm Forbes
There are days in retirement that are the waking equivalent of a dreamless sleep, if you know what I mean. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever." ~Gene Perret
When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you. ~Gene Perret
When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. ~Gail Sheehy
There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial. ~Seneca
Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can't retire his experience. He must use it. ~Bernard Baruch
A gold watch is the most appropriate gift for retirement, as its recipients have given up so many of their golden hours in a lifetime of service. ~Harry Mahtar
Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering. ~Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A.A. Milne
Retirement is having nothing to do and someone always keeping you from it. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Retire from work, but not from life. ~M.K. Soni
Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow. ~Douglas Pagels, These Are the Gifts I'd Like to Give to You
There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day. ~Gene Perret
In retirement, every day is Boss Day and every day is Employee Appreciation Day. ~Terri Guillemets
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. ~Jonathan Clements
I try to treat each evening and weekend as little slices of retirement because no one is guaranteed a lengthy one at the end of their career. ~Mike Hammar
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples. ~George Burns
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Retirement is the ugliest word in the language. ~Ernest Hemingway
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
In my retirement I go for a short swim at least once or twice every day. It's either that or buy a new golf ball. ~Gene Perret
Sometimes it's hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. ~Terri Guillemets
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did. ~Malcolm Forbes
There are days in retirement that are the waking equivalent of a dreamless sleep, if you know what I mean. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever." ~Gene Perret
Farewell speech: Goodbye to you all...
The detailed free farewell speech notes below include going
away speech advice for both people who are glad to escape and people who are
sad to leave:
Describe what you got out of the workplace.
What did you learn, what opportunities did you have, what did you like best about working there, who did you enjoy working with, who helped you the most.
Mention some special people, these may be the people you worked the most with – the ‘team’.
Even if you are leaving because you are sick of the place, there must be something positive to say about your time there.
For example, the company has an impressive safety record, or that it was refreshing to work with creative people.
Don’t pretend that you are sad to be leaving if you obviously aren't (but avoid mentioning it), because people won't respect you if you are openly dishonest.
There is always a time and a place to air your grievances – in private with the boss, or an HR exit interview.
Remember the farewell is the last time to represent yourself well.
Say what you
will take away from your experiences there. Describe what you got out of the workplace.
What did you learn, what opportunities did you have, what did you like best about working there, who did you enjoy working with, who helped you the most.
Mention some special people, these may be the people you worked the most with – the ‘team’.
Even if you are leaving because you are sick of the place, there must be something positive to say about your time there.
For example, the company has an impressive safety record, or that it was refreshing to work with creative people.
Don’t pretend that you are sad to be leaving if you obviously aren't (but avoid mentioning it), because people won't respect you if you are openly dishonest.
There is always a time and a place to air your grievances – in private with the boss, or an HR exit interview.
Remember the farewell is the last time to represent yourself well.
Basically what are the most positive things you will remember about your time there in the workplace.
Mention why you are leaving and how you feel.
Your reason for leaving can be negative if it has nothing to do with the workplace.
If it really is due to the fact that you can’t stand working there, describe this in terms of a positive with the next place you are working.
For example, your next job provides more opportunities in your chosen direction, the job is more ‘autonomous’ etc.
If you truly can’t think of anything that is not badmouthing the company, then don’t mention why you are leaving work, just mention what you will be doing in your time off after your last day.
For example, you can’t wait to go fishing on the weekend, or you are looking forward to seeing the new decor at your local recruitment centre.
General descriptions of how you might feel are:
- excited about the future / opportunities
- hopeful about new beginnings
- curious about new directions
- sad to leave behind great people
- missing working there.
Pick whichever is most appropriate for you.
Say what you
wish for the company and the people left behind. Your hopes for their future. This may include affirming positive things about them and what you know they can achieve.
Wish everyone the best for the future and thank them for the farewell and for your experiences there.
Parting words for a gracious farewell speech.
Retirement sayings and wishes
When it is your turn to say something special about someone who is retiring,
your retirement wishes may be funny, heartfelt or both. Retirements are about endings and beginnings and whatever you say about a retiree should be heartfelt and descriptive of the retiree's contributions in the workplace.
Below are some quotes to help you plan your retirement roast or a toast. For other ideas, see retirement speeches, military retirements, teacher retirements, and when you are the retiree.
Quotations
The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before your boss does. --Anonymous
When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his
colleagues generally present him with a watch.
-- R.C. Sherriff The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before your boss does. --Anonymous
There's one thing I've always wanted to do before I quit: RETIRE. -- Groucho Marx
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. -- Anonymous
Retirement takes all the meaning out of weekends. -- Anonymous
Retirement is a time when you never get around to doing all those things you intended to do when you were still working. -- Anonymous
If people concentrated on the really important things in
life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.
-- Doug Larson
When one door closes, another one opens but we often look so long and
regretfully at the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.
--Alexander Graham Bell -- Doug Larson
You're over the hill when your back goes out more than you do. .--Anonymous
You're getting old when there's no question in your mind that there's no question in your mind.
--Anonymous
Age doesn't matter unless you're a cheese. --Billie Burke
You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing.
--Michael Pritchard
You're only young once but you can be immature all of your life. --Charles Scoggins
Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week. --Maggie Kuhn
I used to dread getting older because I thought I would not be able to do all the things I wanted to do, but now that I am older, I find that I don't want to do them.
--Lady Nancy Astor
Retirement toast
Here's to Jack -- a great colleague we're telling goodbye. There's no doubt we'll miss him... we cannot deny. We have valued his work, his wisdom, his smile... And we hope he'll enjoy a relaxing lifestyle.
Senior humor
When asked the secret of his long life, the elderly gentleman smiled knowingly and said he sprinkled a little gunpowder on his oatmeal every morning.
The young man listening decided to follow that practice and every morning, he added a teaspoon of gunpowder to his oatmeal.
He lived to the age of 93. When he died, he left 12 children, 24 grandchildren, 36-great-grandchildren, and a 12-foot hole in the wall of the crematorium.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did.
In his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car. --Jack Handy
God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never
liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to
see the difference.
Imagine the look on his wife’s face. And what does he have
to look forward to? Happiness? Joy? Relief? The end of a working life!
Perpetual unemployment! Deterioration! Stagnation! Decay!
Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement as you would poison ivy in a nudist camp.
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.
If you are seriously thinking about quitting your job, and have no ready replacement for it, permit me to offer you several practical suggestions: One, don’t quit! Two, keep busy! And three, don’t look back!
First of all, don’t quit! Maggie Kuhn, the founder of the Grey Panthers organisation, once said: “Ours is a throwaway society, and we do it with people as well as machines.”
Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.
If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”
My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.
There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
If you choose employment, why not become a management consultant-like everyone else. All it takes is a title, a phone number and 500 business cards.
If you need a title, be imaginative. I know an auto mechanic who is now a “vehicle maintenance engineer.” He repairs my Toyota - and drives a Mercedes.
If you need a degree, that’s simple for you Toastmasters. All you have to do is complete the Basic Communication and Leadership Manual, and put CTM (Competent Toastmaster) behind your name. For all anyone knows, CTM means “Master of Computer Technology,” and that’s pretty important these days.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.
The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
If you run out of ideas, try coordinating Speechcraft and Youth Leadership, the finest programs ever invented, for the training of the young - of all ages, and I might add, for the rejuvenation of jaded Toastmasters.
Which brings me to my third point: don’t look back! James M. Barrie, the author of Peter Pan, once wrote: “God gave us memories, so that we could have roses in December.” Roses, not regrets. Nursing homes are filled with people who cling to their regrets like security blankets.
Don’t look back and look down. Life isn’t a vicious circle. It’s a rising spiral, a cornucopia of opportunities. (Grandma Moses, Buckminster Fuller, Col. Sanders, Pablo Casals and our own Cavett Robert and Roy Graham are models of geriatric initiative.)
Pablo Casals at 90, for example, when asked why he practiced eight hours a day, replied: “I think I’m improving.”
Just last week I heard of a Toastmaster who spent his first Social Security check on lessons in hang gliding. That’s the spirit!
What it all adds up to is this: we can’t quit. We can’t retire from life. It’s too precious. We’ve got to keep working, whether for money, fun or glory. And above all we mustn’t look back.
Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.
It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.
Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.
Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement as you would poison ivy in a nudist camp.
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.
If you are seriously thinking about quitting your job, and have no ready replacement for it, permit me to offer you several practical suggestions: One, don’t quit! Two, keep busy! And three, don’t look back!
First of all, don’t quit! Maggie Kuhn, the founder of the Grey Panthers organisation, once said: “Ours is a throwaway society, and we do it with people as well as machines.”
Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.
If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”
My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.
There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
If you choose employment, why not become a management consultant-like everyone else. All it takes is a title, a phone number and 500 business cards.
If you need a title, be imaginative. I know an auto mechanic who is now a “vehicle maintenance engineer.” He repairs my Toyota - and drives a Mercedes.
If you need a degree, that’s simple for you Toastmasters. All you have to do is complete the Basic Communication and Leadership Manual, and put CTM (Competent Toastmaster) behind your name. For all anyone knows, CTM means “Master of Computer Technology,” and that’s pretty important these days.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.
The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
If you run out of ideas, try coordinating Speechcraft and Youth Leadership, the finest programs ever invented, for the training of the young - of all ages, and I might add, for the rejuvenation of jaded Toastmasters.
Which brings me to my third point: don’t look back! James M. Barrie, the author of Peter Pan, once wrote: “God gave us memories, so that we could have roses in December.” Roses, not regrets. Nursing homes are filled with people who cling to their regrets like security blankets.
Don’t look back and look down. Life isn’t a vicious circle. It’s a rising spiral, a cornucopia of opportunities. (Grandma Moses, Buckminster Fuller, Col. Sanders, Pablo Casals and our own Cavett Robert and Roy Graham are models of geriatric initiative.)
Pablo Casals at 90, for example, when asked why he practiced eight hours a day, replied: “I think I’m improving.”
Just last week I heard of a Toastmaster who spent his first Social Security check on lessons in hang gliding. That’s the spirit!
What it all adds up to is this: we can’t quit. We can’t retire from life. It’s too precious. We’ve got to keep working, whether for money, fun or glory. And above all we mustn’t look back.
Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.
It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.
Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.
Funny Retirement Speech.
Poignant and Funny Retirement Advice - Retirement? Never!
There is a commercial on Television these days which shows a
gentleman, apparently just returned from his office retirement party, walking
through the front door and saying to his wife: “Honey, I’m home ... forever!”
Imagine the look on his wife’s face. And what does he have to look forward to? Happiness? Joy? Relief? The end of a working life! Perpetual unemployment! Deterioration! Stagnation! Decay!
Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement as you would poison ivy in a nudist camp.
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.
If you are seriously thinking about quitting your job, and have no ready replacement for it, permit me to offer you several practical suggestions: One, don’t quit! Two, keep busy! And three, don’t look back!
First of all, don’t quit! Maggie Kuhn, the founder of the Grey Panthers organisation, once said: “Ours is a throwaway society, and we do it with people as well as machines.”
Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.
If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”
My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.
There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
If you choose employment, why not become a management consultant-like everyone else. All it takes is a title, a phone number and 500 business cards.
If you need a title, be imaginative. I know an auto mechanic who is now a “vehicle maintenance engineer.” He repairs my Toyota - and drives a Mercedes.
If you need a degree, that’s simple for you Toastmasters. All you have to do is complete the Basic Communication and Leadership Manual, and put CTM (Competent Toastmaster) behind your name. For all anyone knows, CTM means “Master of Computer Technology,” and that’s pretty important these days.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.
The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
If you run out of ideas, try coordinating Speechcraft and Youth Leadership, the finest programs ever invented, for the training of the young - of all ages, and I might add, for the rejuvenation of jaded Toastmasters.
Which brings me to my third point: don’t look back! James M. Barrie, the author of Peter Pan, once wrote: “God gave us memories, so that we could have roses in December.” Roses, not regrets. Nursing homes are filled with people who cling to their regrets like security blankets.
Don’t look back and look down. Life isn’t a vicious circle. It’s a rising spiral, a cornucopia of opportunities. (Grandma Moses, Buckminster Fuller, Col. Sanders, Pablo Casals and our own Cavett Robert and Roy Graham are models of geriatric initiative.)
Pablo Casals at 90, for example, when asked why he practiced eight hours a day, replied: “I think I’m improving.”
Just last week I heard of a Toastmaster who spent his first Social Security check on lessons in hang gliding. That’s the spirit!
What it all adds up to is this: we can’t quit. We can’t retire from life. It’s too precious. We’ve got to keep working, whether for money, fun or glory. And above all we mustn’t look back.
Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.
It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.
Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.
Imagine the look on his wife’s face. And what does he have to look forward to? Happiness? Joy? Relief? The end of a working life! Perpetual unemployment! Deterioration! Stagnation! Decay!
Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement as you would poison ivy in a nudist camp.
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.
If you are seriously thinking about quitting your job, and have no ready replacement for it, permit me to offer you several practical suggestions: One, don’t quit! Two, keep busy! And three, don’t look back!
First of all, don’t quit! Maggie Kuhn, the founder of the Grey Panthers organisation, once said: “Ours is a throwaway society, and we do it with people as well as machines.”
Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.
If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”
My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.
There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
If you choose employment, why not become a management consultant-like everyone else. All it takes is a title, a phone number and 500 business cards.
If you need a title, be imaginative. I know an auto mechanic who is now a “vehicle maintenance engineer.” He repairs my Toyota - and drives a Mercedes.
If you need a degree, that’s simple for you Toastmasters. All you have to do is complete the Basic Communication and Leadership Manual, and put CTM (Competent Toastmaster) behind your name. For all anyone knows, CTM means “Master of Computer Technology,” and that’s pretty important these days.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.
The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
If you run out of ideas, try coordinating Speechcraft and Youth Leadership, the finest programs ever invented, for the training of the young - of all ages, and I might add, for the rejuvenation of jaded Toastmasters.
Which brings me to my third point: don’t look back! James M. Barrie, the author of Peter Pan, once wrote: “God gave us memories, so that we could have roses in December.” Roses, not regrets. Nursing homes are filled with people who cling to their regrets like security blankets.
Don’t look back and look down. Life isn’t a vicious circle. It’s a rising spiral, a cornucopia of opportunities. (Grandma Moses, Buckminster Fuller, Col. Sanders, Pablo Casals and our own Cavett Robert and Roy Graham are models of geriatric initiative.)
Pablo Casals at 90, for example, when asked why he practiced eight hours a day, replied: “I think I’m improving.”
Just last week I heard of a Toastmaster who spent his first Social Security check on lessons in hang gliding. That’s the spirit!
What it all adds up to is this: we can’t quit. We can’t retire from life. It’s too precious. We’ve got to keep working, whether for money, fun or glory. And above all we mustn’t look back.
Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.
It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.
Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.
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