Tuesday, 26 November 2013

RETIREMENT SPEECH

RETIREMENT  SPEECH
Someone once said that the best audience is one that is intelligent,well-educated and ... a little drunk! If that is the case - then I have definitely got an amazing audience here tonight.
Lord Reading offered the following advice on presenting a speech: "Always be shorter than anyone dared to hope!" and tonight Ladies and Gentlemen, you may be very hopeful.
I hope that we will meet again, when we least expect it.
Retirement! I can't quite believe that it is happening to me.
You always seem to think of retirement as something way ahead of you; something that is still a long way off. Well, it has a way of sneaking up on you. And here I am ... poised on the brink of my own retirement.
And may you always continue to listen to your heart - because in the end - some of the most beautiful things that you'll ever experience will be seen and heard through your heart.
Thank you one and all.

RETIREMENT WISHES

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back, when you have forgotten the words...  We will miss your friendship and positive disposition  - we'll keep your song in our hearts!
A retired husband is often a wife's full time job.
Heaven - that's my retirement plan!
I always arrive late at the office...But I make up for it by leaving early.
When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house...
You know you're retired!
As I stand here tonight, I look out over all the faces of my colleagues and I consider how blessed I am to be able count so many of you as friends. I have indeed been incredibly fortunate to have been surrounded by so many friends, mentors, role models, respected business people, leaders and pioneers - all of you special in your respective and unique ways.

RETIREMENT WISHES

Where is the good in goodbye? 
Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will.  ~Author Unknown

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.  ~ A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job. 

RETIREMENT WISHES

Retired is being twice tired, I've thought First tired of working, Then tired of not.


I've been attending lots of seminars in my retirement.  They're called naps.  ~

Retirement:  It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.  

RETIREMENT WISHES


I'm retired - goodbye tension, hello pension!  ~Author Unknown

Retirement: World's longest coffee break.  ~Author Unknown

Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me.  I never had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids, my wife, the tree outside my very own front door.  And, the beauty of time itself. 
Life begins at retirement.  ~Author Unknown 

RETIREMENT WISHES


The challenge of retirement is how to spend time without spending money. 
Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it. 
There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working.  ~Robert Half
Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. 

RETIREMENT WISHES

When you retire, think and act as if you were still working; when you're still working, think and act a bit as if you were already retired.  ~Author Unknown

The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income. 

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. 

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron.
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.  When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. 

When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.  ~Chi Chi Rodriguez

RETIREMENT WISHES


A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job.  ~Ella Harris

Retired is being twice tired, I've thought First tired of working, Then tired of not.
~Richard Armour

I've been attending lots of seminars in my retirement.  They're called naps. 

Retirement:  It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.

I'm retired - goodbye tension, hello pension!  Retirement: World's longest coffee break. 
Retirement has been a discovery of beauty for me.  I never had the time before to notice the beauty of my grandkids, my wife, the tree outside my very own front door.  And, the beauty of time itself.  ~Hartman Jule

RETIREMENT WISHES


O, blest retirement! friend to life's decline - How blest is he who crowns, in shades like these,
A youth of labor with an age of ease! ~Oliver Goldsmith

Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.  ~Author Unknown

RETIREMENT WISHES


Life begins at retirement. 
The challenge of retirement is how to spend time without spending money.  ~Author Unknown

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.  ~Doug Larson

Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.  ~Gene Perret

RETIREMENT WISHES

There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working.  ~Robert Half
Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time.  ~J. Lubbock

RETIREMENT WISHES

When you retire, think and act as if you were still working; when you're still working, think and act a bit as if you were already retired.  ~Author Unknown

The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income.  ~George Foreman

RETIREMENT WISHES

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf.  ~Gene Perret

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron.  ~Hartman Jule

RETIREMENT WISHES

Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.  ~Jim Bishop

Don't play too much golf.  Two rounds a day are plenty.  ~Harry Vardon

The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.  ~Author Unknown

Don't simply retire from something; have something to retire to.  ~Harry Emerson Fosdick

I'm now as free as the breeze - with roughly the same income.  ~Gene Perret

RETIREMENT WISHES

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.  ~Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949

When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you.  ~Gene Perret

When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces.  Women go right on cooking.  ~Gail Sheehy

RETIREMENT WISHES

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. 
Retire from work, but not from life. 
Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did.  ~Malcolm Forbes

There are days in retirement that are the waking equivalent of a dreamless sleep, if you know what I mean.  ~Robert Brault,
www.robertbrault.com

Retirement:  That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever."  ~Gene Perret

RETIREMENT WISHES

Farewell speech: Goodbye to you all...

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. -- Anonymous

RETIREMENT WISHES

Retirement takes all the meaning out of weekends.
Imagine the look on his wife’s face. And what does he have to look forward to? Happiness? Joy? Relief? The end of a working life! Perpetual unemployment! Deterioration! Stagnation! Decay!
Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement as you would poison ivy in a nudist camp.
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.

RETIREMENT WISHES

If you are seriously thinking about quitting your job, and have no ready replacement for it, permit me to offer you several practical suggestions: One, don’t quit! Two, keep busy! And three, don’t look back!
First of all, don’t quit! Maggie Kuhn, the founder of the Grey Panthers organisation, once said: “Ours is a throwaway society, and we do it with people as well as machines.”
Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.
If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”

RETIREMENT WISHES

My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.

RETIREMENT WISHES

There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.

RETIREMENT WISHES

The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
If you run out of ideas, try coordinating Speechcraft and Youth Leadership, the finest programs ever invented, for the training of the young - of all ages, and I might add, for the rejuvenation of jaded Toastmasters.

RETIREMENT WISHES

Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.
It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.
Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.

RETIREMENT WISHES

Funny Retirement Advice - Retirement? Never!

There is a commercial on Television these days which shows a gentleman, apparently just returned from his office retirement party, walking through the front door and saying to his wife: “Honey, I’m home ... forever!”

Imagine the look on his wife’s face. And what does he have to look forward to? Happiness? Joy? Relief? The end of a working life! Perpetual unemployment! Deterioration! Stagnation! Decay!

RETIREMENT WISHES

Luckily, most of you people - especially homemakers-don’t have that problem. You never retire. But for all career men and women, my advice is: Avoid retirement
By “retirement” I mean the sudden stoppage of work, going from the dynamic career to the doldrums, from vigour to vegetation.

RETIREMENT WISHES

Unfortunately, sometimes we do it ourselves, when we quit work prematurely. How of ten have you heard about men and women having heart attacks, shortly after retiring? Why? Because not infrequently, the retirement itself is more distressful than the work it was supposed to replace.

RETIREMENT WISHES


If I had my say, every pension check would carry a warning: “This retirement may be hazardous to your health.”

My second point is a corollary to the first: keep busy! You’ve got to keep working, one way or another. You’ve got to have a goal in life in order to survive.

RETIREMENT WISHES

There are a number of options available: employment, leisure, volunteerism...take your pick.
Another way to keep busy is by what I call “purposeful leisure.” Too often people think of leisure as the absence of work. Nonsense! It’s productive labour. Do you realise how much green fees and golf cart fees, for example, contribute to the gross national product? Billions! You golfers out there, men and women, tell your spouses that when you get up at four o’clock in the morning.

RETIREMENT WISHES


The best way to keep busy, of course, is by volunteer service. There must be a hundred thousand organisations out there that could use your help right now. They won’t discriminate against you because of your grey hair-or the lack of it, you grey panthers and bald eagles.
What it all adds up to is this: we can’t quit. We can’t retire from life. It’s too precious. We’ve got to keep working, whether for money, fun or glory. And above all we mustn’t look back.

RETIREMENT WISHES


Retirement? Never!
It’s never too late to learn-to grow-to create, to do all the wonderful things we had no time for in our youth. This is what the last third of life is about.

RETIREMENT WISHES


It’s a time of discovery, when we really begin to see, perhaps for the first time, the providence of God, the love of family, friends and neighbours-even Toastmasters-and sometimes we even catch a glimpse of our own potential...still...to do great deeds.

Life, my friends, is not a candle flickering in the breeze. It’s a torch to light new flames.

RETIREMENT WISHES





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